Think you’re unlucky in love ? You know nothing of dating misery until you’ve delved into the world of the undatable gay Mark Morgan just can’t catch a break. As he documents his struggles through the dating minefield of the gay world, Mark tries to find the answer to the eternal question: does Mr Right truly exist? With his best friend and fag hag, Tullene for support and a bottle of Savvy B (or 6), he battles hisway through failed date after date. And ponders many a profound question: How much savvy B is too much? Will he ever be able to bottom? Should you wear Ugg boots on a first date? Can you find love in a gay sauna? One man keeps popping up ( pardon the pun) like a proverbial bad penny, but will Mark ever bag Travis. Or should he leave him where he found him- in his late teens on a dance floor in G-A-Y?
When and where do you prefer to write?
I prefer to write at night because it means I can open a bottle of savvy b without feeling guilty. But I can literally write anywhere. On my bed, at the kitchen table, on the tube, on the beach. I have my pen and pad with me at all times so if something pops into my head, I can write it down immediately.
Do you need peace and quiet when you are writing?
Not particularly. Once I start writing, I can just shut myself off from the world and I get lost in the world I’m creating on the paper. I actually play music whilst I’m writing. And I’m a fan of dance and house music so you can tell I definitely DON’T need peace and quiet.
If you had a chance to co-write a book, whom would it be with?
I’m going to cheat here and give two answers. That’s a gay man’s prerogative. I would love to write a book with Oscar Wilde because I absolutely adore him. His life fascinates me. The fact he was imprisoned just for being homosexual. I’m so glad we’re not still living in those times. But I would also love to write a play with Noel Coward. I’ve seen all his plays about five times- not even joking. I mean, I know they’re both dead so it might prove difficult to co-write with them but I live in hope of them being resurrected!
Say someone asks if they can use your name in a book. Would you rather be the ‘good one’ or the ‘bad one’?
THE BAD ONE. HANDS DOWN. I think I’m too nice in real life so it would be nice to be bad just for a little while. I mean, I can be a bit of a bitch but that’s only faux.
Who would you like/have liked to interview?
JOAN RIVERS! Rest in peace you comedy genius. I often get called a gay Joan Rivers by my friends because I’m so inappropriate most of the time so I think we would have been riotous together.
Where can I find you when you are reading?
In bed. Or on a beach. That’s literally the only places I read. Unless you count the newspaper which I normally read on the bog.
Where can I find you when you are not writing/reading?
In the swimming pool. That is my happy place. You literally can’t do anything once you’re In the pool, except for swim, think and perv on the fit men in speedos.
What goes through your mind when you hold your new book in your hands for the first time?
Who the fuck was stupid enough to publish my mad ramblings?
How do you come up with a title for your book?
Ooooh, that’s a hard one. Pun intended. I would love to give a very clever answer here, that I give them a title using a philosophical , intellectual method but I just call it whatever pops into my head.
How do you pick a cover for your book?
I have to say, I have never picked a cover for a book. Actually, that’s a lie, my first book, a novella called THE FUN AND FROLICS OF FIFI A L’ORANGE, I had an artist create a drag queen silhouette with my gorgeous face shoved on top of the body. That was pretty cool. The Undateable Gay, I LOVE THIS COVER, but I can’t take credit for this one. Spellbound created that all on their own and I couldn’t have hoped for a better, bolder, brighter cover. It reflects my personality PERFECTLY.
About the Author
Mark has been writing since the tender age of 8, ever since his father bought him a typewriter home from a neighbour’s skip. He graduated from Brunel university in 2009 with a 2:1 BA in Creative Writing where he discovered his talent for writing comedy and melodrama. When he’s not writing, he can generally be found with a glass of New Zealand Savvy B in his hand. And to be honest, he can even be found with one in his hand if he is writing!! He says some of his best work has been written whilst under the influence. He is a swimming fanatic and does 70 lengths daily. And he swears blind that his enthusiasm for the sport has absolutely nothing to do with the men in tight speedos. He is also a keen Walker. He’s often out in the Surrey Hills on a Sunday, partaking in a ten mile walk. Well, he says he’s got to keep his bottom nice and tight because you never know whose looking! He sits on the board of trustees for The Gay Outdoor Club, an organisation that arranges outdoor activities for members of the LGBTQ+ community.
Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/mark.woollard.39
Instagram : https://www.instagram.com/markdavidwoollard/
Amazon US -https://www.amazon.com/Undateable-Gay-funniest-book-TikTok-ebook/dp/B09Z32N75Y